


Being Human for Dummies

by Colombenoire4hope



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Androids, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-25
Updated: 2013-12-26
Packaged: 2017-12-24 15:24:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,172
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/941532
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Colombenoire4hope/pseuds/Colombenoire4hope
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They weren't supposed to have met, hell, they weren't suppose to know the other existed! Now, Arthur is lost in blue eyes, and goddammit, he isn't supposed to have feelings.</p><p>Two-shots</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Meeting

June 2023

My name is Arthur. Arthur Kirkland. I have been created 10 years ago as a 25 years old, British male with green eyes, and dirty blond hair. In matter of abilities, I can currently speak 25 languages but my storage capacity goes up to 300 languages, including dialects and dead ones. I can read any kind of text and have been programmed to be a talented story teller. I am very useful to write speeches, stories, and poetry as well as any other kind of written need you may have, amongst other things. Master uses me as his personal PA, and to take care of his son, Alfred. If I were him, I would be ashamed that an android, no matter how advanced and human-like, can tend to a 5 years old boy better than his own father. I wouldn’t mind if it was for an actual reason but no, the man simply doesn’t care. Why he had him in the first place, I don’t know, and I don’t want to know. It would use space in my short and long term memory. Master doesn’t know what he’s missing and, like that, I have a companion that makes me feel important and, most importantly, human. Because the other thing Master doesn’t know is that I have been programmed with critical thinking. It’s a mistake, a virus, and I know it. I have since I first became conscious; by the arrogant way he was looking at me, and got a clear confirmation later during my first day when he was talking to an old friend over the phone.  
“The perfect human robot”, he said, “He looks like one, and feels like one, but is smarter, and stronger! All the best attributes of a human being without all the useless emotions and thinking that make us question the world around us all the time.”  
The only thing keeping from speaking up and telling him he’s an idiotic twat was the decision to keep this ability he calls useless. I think it’s quite useful. One word that could let him know he made a mistake in my programs, and I get dispatched to be reprogrammed “properly”. As long as Master is alive, I have to keep up with the role of the “perfect being”. But one day, I will tell him how hopeless I think he is.  
A.K

June 2033

“Arthur! Dude, how are you!”  
The android sighed at Alfred’s loud interruption but kept working as he replied.  
“I have nothing to report, my circuits are functioning just fine and I still have fifty percent of my storage capacity free.”  
The now fifteen years old boy rolled his eyes at the response.  
“You know, this kind of answer is the only thing that betrays your robot nature! Can’t you just say you’re fine?”  
“This word would require the use of feelings which I do not possess. Your father-”  
“Forget the old man! He’s a controlling freak with a twisted perception of the world.”

The American threw his bag at the foot of the couch before heading for the kitchen to get his afternoon snack. Arthur shook his head at the gesture and erased the words from his memory bank to prevent yet another fight between father and son. He finished analyzing the data he was given just in time for when Alfred came out of the kitchen and plopped down on the couch next to him.  
“Where is he now anyways?”  
“Master Jones is at a meeting with fellow scientist.”  
He waited for the bitter remark that always came when Alfred learned his father was away (which was most of the time), but was slightly confused when none came.   
“Something wrong lad?” he asked.  
Alfred shifted a bit before engulfing the last bite of his snack.  
“Nothing just a long day.”  
Arthur stared at him without blinking as a clear message that he knew something wasn’t right and was waiting for an answer. Alfred tried to resist but ended by explaining himself knowing the android wouldn’t let it go.  
“I finally had a perfect grade in science like he so badly wanted me to. I wanted to announce it myself, but now that I think of it, it’s better that way. He wouldn’t have been satisfied anyways”  
“I think you did great.”  
Alfred grinned.  
“That’s ‘cause you’re my true father figure, even if you have the emotional range of a rock, but I like you anyways!”

He laughed at his own joke, and grabbed something from his bag on the floor. His face had lost any trace of sadness and he was back to his extravagant behavior. Arthur considered it a success.  
“I need your opinion on something.” Alfred stated, almost serious.  
Arthur frowned.  
“Alfred…”  
“Yes! I know! We have to be careful about father learning your extra program unless we want you to get dispatched but I really want your opinion for this. Please? I have been able to keep your secret for five years, no?”  
True. Alfred had done a great job at keeping his mouth shut and hadn’t used it against Arthur. The boy was a true angel. Sometimes.

“What is it?” he relented.  
The American’s grin got even wider and he handed him the picture of a boy about his age with soft blond locks and purple eyes.  
“His name is Mathew, he’s Canadian, absolutely adorable, great to talk with, and guess what; his father is an asshole too. He’s a bit quite though.”  
“You show all the signs of someone with a crush.”  
“What? NO.”  
Arthur didn’t insist, not really a connoisseur in human emotions, and stared at the picture silently.  
“Well, what do you think?” Alfred urged on.  
Arthur raised an eyebrow.  
“I will have to meet him in person if you want me to tell you what I think.”  
“Great! He’s coming over tomorrow; you’ll give me your opinion then! Do warn father we have guest weather he likes it or not.”

With these final words, Alfred jumped off the couch and out of the living room, probably to his room where he would do whatever teenagers did these days. Arthur watch him go slightly discouraged but at the same time understanding of Alfred’s anger towards his father. He picked up his papers and headed straight for Mr.Jones’ lab to transfer him his results- and warn him of his son’s plans.  
OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO

“Aaaand this! Is Arthur! My father’s secret pride and joy, but also my best friend and my true father figure!”  
Alfred had given Mathew a tour of the house and had kept Arthur last for presentations because it was to be expected that Mathew would have a lot of questions. The android politely smiled, and shook the Canadian’s hand.  
“Nice to meet you.”  
Mathew’s eyes were wide with surprised and he seemed genuinely impressed. Arthur smiled even wider; he had that kind of effect on the few people he had met.  
“You mean he’s an android?”  
“Yup!”  
“A real one? Not just a human being that got a few of his parts replaced with metal ones?”  
“A real one, from the heart to the toes.”  
This impressed him greatly.  
“Can I… look?”  
Alfred invited him too with a gesture of the hand.

Mathew gently touched his arms and hands, asked him a few questions and even started a conversation as if he was human too. This impressed the android greatly; it usually took time for a human to get used to him. When he was done, the Canadian stepped back, and smiled in awe. Nothing could have prepared Alfred and Arthur for the surprise he had for them.   
“This is incredible! You are just like Francis! The only differences are the physical appearance and the ethnic origin.” 

It was Alfred’s turn to be surprised (Arthur would have been too if only he could). He blinked as he tried to regain his voice, but before he could say anything someone cleared his throat at the door. Master Jones was standing there, a severe look on his face, and with his usual intimidating posture. Arthur hadn’t been warned of his presence at the manor, but that often happened when the master wanted to come home. It was a part of his secretive character to make as if he had last minute decisions when he had actually made his decision hours prior. It was hard to know clearly when and where the man was going to be.

Judging by the glint in his eyes, Arthur knew he hadn’t regretted to come. Mr. Jones advanced two steps in the room, and let his ice cold stare fall on Mathew.  
“Lad” He said, “Could you repeat what you just said?”  
Mathew hesitated for barely a second before speaking up.  
“My father, sir, has an android very similar to yours.”  
There was a twitch on the man’s face that was meant to be a smile before he turned away and out of the room.  
“Arthur, call the lad’s father and organize us a meeting as soon as possible. Cancel my other meetings if necessary.”  
He closed the door behind him, leaving everyone, even Arthur, confused as to what had just happened.  
OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO

 

‘As soon as possible’ ended up being the very next morning. Mr. Williams was just as curious as Mr.Jones about the matter and wanted to see for himself the resemblance. Well that was what…Francis had told him over the phone. The few seconds they had talked to arrange the meeting had been enough for Arthur to know that he and the other robot had indeed a lot in common, and now he was living one of the few moments of his existence where he thought it would be convenient to have feelings. Being so cold about the discovery of a being just as smart and advanced as him didn’t sound right. But well, there was nothing he could do about that.

Alfred had tagged along with them to spend the day with Mathew as their fathers would spend the day comparing and discussing their androids. He, at least could be excited about the incoming day, for the Android, it was already qualified as boring. When Arthur parked the car in the William’s mansion’s driveway, at 10 AM exactly, three people were waiting for them outside. Mr. Williams, Mathew… and the deepest blue eyes Arthur had ever seen.

OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO

June 2023  
My name is Francis, Francis Bonnefoys. I have been created eleven years ago as a 25 years old French male with blue eyes, and shoulder length, blond hair. In matter of abilities, I can currently speak 25 languages, but my storage capacity goes up to 300 languages, including dialects and dead ones. I can read any kind of text, but have been especially programmed for descriptions. I am very useful to write speeches, give complete descriptions of the place/person/object of interest, and to cook, amongst other things. Master uses me as his personal PA, and to do the housework, which include tending to his 6 years old son, Mathew. Master Williams doesn’t care for the boy, and my original function didn’t include him, but I executed my tasks quickly and perfectly which made him add this program to have some peace of mind. I’m glad he did because it gave me a friend that promises to become a successful young man, and helps me feel less lonely. Because what Master doesn’t know is that I have feelings. Lots and lots of feelings like joy, loneliness, hope… But he must never know. Ever.  
It was a mistake that slipped in my programs, and I’ve know it since my first moment of consciousness. It was written on almost every piece of paper in the room:  
Perfect human:  
-No opinion.  
-No emotion.   
I’ve worked hard on keeping my emotions hidden; I even developed what humans call an acting talent to keep them hidden. He would call it a virus, I call it protection. The arrival of Mathew helped a lot because it gave me another reason to work on keeping myself in check. One wrong gesture or one wrong word, and I get dispatched to be reprogrammed. But I want to stay the way I am because my emotions are the reason I feel alive. Almost human.  
F.B.

OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO

June 2033

“This is truly incredible! Mr. Jones, I have to congratulate you. This android is a masterpiece!”  
“And you as well Mr. Williams. Your robot has been created with a very intelligent technique.”  
In the end, Francis and Arthur were similar program-wise, but their interior circuits were very different. This didn’t seem to faze the scientists, quite the contrary, as they continued running batteries of tests on what they considered as mere pieces of metal put together and given life to by their ingenious hands.

“They can accomplish their tasks at the exact same speed for most but… Francis seems to be faster to describe and plan while Arthur is faster to calculate and analyze.”  
Not once did they let the androids look at each other, or interact. They kept analyzing deeper and deeper to the point where Francis got slightly afraid they would find his extra program, and where Arthur started saying goodbye to his critical thinking.

“As for the domestic aspect, Francis is a better cook, and interacts more easily with humans, but Arthur does the laundry better, and registers little routines faster.”  
For a whole month, Mathew and Alfred didn’t get to see them, even when school ended. Mathew longed the delicious pastries Francis would cook to congratulate him, and Alfred mourned the only night where Arthur would accept to play the video games he called rubbish with him.

“They complete each other perfectly!”  
Mr.Jones and Mr. Williams looked at each other and nodded. They just had the same idea.  
One month after he heard of Francis, Arthur saw his whole life turn upside down.

OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO

July 2033

“Blueprints? You are creating another robot? What for? Don’t you think you could spend your time doing something else?”  
Alfred had pestered his father so much, the man decided to explain briefly why they were going the each other’s houses so much, and had told him to fetch Mathew, Francis, and Arthur in the living room where he would make his big announcement. The news didn’t please the boys, at all, an Alfred had protested vividly.  
“It is for the good of humanity” Replied the man. Alfred scoffed.  
“Humanity? You kept Arthur a secret all these years, not even sharing a bit of his technology with the world. How do you want THAT to help humanity!”  
“That is not of your business, my boy, you wouldn’t understand.”  
Alfred looked ready to punch his biologic father in the face when Mathew, who hadn’t said a word until now, spoke up.  
“What will happen to Francis, and Arthur?”

The two androids hadn’t moved since they had learned they were being replaced (Their masters hadn’t told them).  
“They will be disposable once we will have finished comparing them to the new android.”  
“What? You can’t do that!” protested Alfred once again.  
Mr. Jones sneered at his son.  
“Why not? They are just robots, metal. Machines.”   
“They are living beings!”  
Mr. Jones paled of rage.  
“No they are not! Now I suggest you cease this nonsense, or their will be consequences! Enjoy Francis, and Arthur while you can, and let me and Mr. Williams work in peace!”  
The American left with those last words, slamming the door behind him, and leaving Alfred, and Mathew frozen in shock and anger at the news. Unable to think much about it, the two androids turned to each other, and finally managed to have a good look at the other. Arthur extended a hand to Francis who took it and shook it.  
“Arthur Kirkland”  
“Francis Bonnefoys.”

Their voices stirred the two boys away from their preoccupying thoughts.  
“There has to be a way to prevent this! We could ask our father to have the both of you given to us, or to keep you for the house work or…” Mathew was slightly frantic as he proposed solutions he knew wouldn’t work. Francis placed a hand on his shoulder while Arthur shook his head gently.  
“You know they will never accept. They want us to be kept a secret, and they are creating a robot that will be more performing than us. We will be useless to them.”  
“How can you be so… calm about the situation?” asked Alfred.  
“Because there is nothing we can do about it. They have complete control over us, and we have to listen to their every word even if they want to… destroy us.

The slight hesitation in Francis’ reply didn’t go unnoticed to Alfred and Arthur who looked at him questionably. The French android only lowered his eyes, and Mathew sighed.  
“I guess this is something we can tell you, there is nothing to lose anyways…”  
He shot a quick glance at Francis before continuing.  
“Father made a mistake in Francis’ programs, and downloaded the reactions human beings have in front of certain situations, as well as the consequences of these reactions. Francis registered, understood, learned, and developed them.”  
“In other words…”  
“He has feelings, yes.”  
“There was nothing I could do! At first, I tried deleting them but it didn’t work so I had to resolve in hiding them as best as I could, and now…”  
There was sheer panic in those blue eyes now that the android didn’t bother hiding it, and he found himself seated next to Mathew in discouragement. The other two quickly did the same, this news adding up to the other one, and making it even harder to accept what was to come. The room was silent for a few seconds before Arthur broke it by speaking up in what he hoped was a comforting tone.

“If it can be of any help… I too have what is considered a virus in my programs. Personally, I find it quite useful.”  
“Arty has his own opinion on things!”  
“It’s called critical thinking.”  
“Same thing”  
Before Arthur could start explaining the difference between the two, Francis piped in:   
“Having an opinion sounds rather nice.”  
“Having emotions looks rather useful.”   
Francis chuckled weakly.  
“It can also be a disadvantage at times. Like now for example.”  
“So is having an opinion of yours. It can get confusing.”  
“But it’s human! The perfect humans, my ass! You can’t be human without feelings or opinions! It’s what makes us so different from one another, so unique!”  
Alfred’s unexpected outburst made everyone jump (of surprise for Francis and Mathew, but for Arthur it was because his ears sensors had reacted violently at the sudden rise of volume).   
“I refuse to let you guys get destroyed, especially after everything you did for me and Matt!”  
Mathew nodded, and stood up with a new vigor. A plan, a bit stupid, and still not very well defined, had formed in his head.

“It is decided then.” The Canadian’s voice was more firm than any time before. “Arthur will teach Francis to have an opinion while Francis will teach him to have emotions. The four of us are getting out of here.”  
“What? But this is too dangerous!” Exclaimed Arthur.  
“I agree. We’ll need to do a list of everything we need to do before we get started, thought. I’m sure we could use our fathers’ influence in the world to set up a few things.” Nodded Alfred.  
“But I don’t agree! Alfred is only 15, and you, Mathew, are only 16! How do you expect to live alone out there! Nor Francis, nor I can be of any help and you are too young.” Interrupted Arthur.  
“But there has to be a way!”   
“It could work… But we’d have to be patient.” Everyone turned to Francis as he spoke up, “It took more than a year to create us, so combining our systems and programming this new robot should take around the same time. Plus, if we think about it, we could slow down the construction to two years. Mathew will then be 18, and Alfred 17. Old enough, non?

Arthur stayed silent a bit, thinking over the whole thing, and then nodded.  
“That… is a very good idea.”  
“You think so?”  
“Yes. However, we will need to wait until Mr. Williams, and Master Jones don’t need us anymore to prevent them from looking for us. It might be a bit tight, but it’s better than being tracked down.”  
“Very well then! This will give us the time to do everything properly, and deactivate the total control our fathers have over you. And I know the perfect person to do that: me!” Chimed Alfred.  
“You can do that? Really?” Asked Mathew slightly septic.  
“Dude, My father is a programmer, and a villain in this whole affair, it’s only logical that I’m the hero, and a hacker!” 

Arthur knew this was the worst plan ever. It was disorganized, and reckless, but as he looked at Mathew, and Alfred talking excitedly about everything there was to do, he couldn’t bring himself to care. When he looked at Francis, he also knew he was in for the best time of his life.


	2. Chapter 2

September 2033  
For the first few months, the two robots barely had a few minutes to talk without being heard by their masters even if everyone had moved into one big house for the purpose of working more easily. They did manage to learn a few things but not much. 

The first time, they talked for exactly 10 seconds, while crossing in the staircase. Francis was going up, and Arthur was going down.  
“I have compiled everything in a file for you; tell me when you’re ready to receive it. I organized it all in the way I find the most understandable, but feel free to rearrange it if it helps you.” Had rapidly murmured the Frenchman.  
“I have some information for you as well; I’ll download them to you as soon as we have time.” Arthur had answered back just a quickly.  
They didn’t stop to walk. They didn’t look back. 

The second time, not a word was exchanged. Francis was too busy trying to classify and hide the “I think…”, the “It would be preferable…” and all the other new expressions he didn’t understand yet in his vocabulary bank and Arthur was trying to fit in all the “I hope…”, “I wish…” etc. in the smallest file possible while not looking through it too much because there was so much.   
Thank god it was the middle of the night; thank god their masters were getting their first sleep in days and were unlikely to wake up. They could be alone as they tasted the other half of the forbidden fruit.

The third time was the very next day and their first real conversation. Arthur qualified it as interesting, Francis as fun. It happened in the kitchen, early in the morning while preparing breakfast for their Masters. Arthur was setting the table when he finally dared to ask:   
“What is the difference between being angry and furious?”  
“They are different stages of anger, furious being higher than angry. You tend to be more forgiving when you are angry, and you lose control more easily when you are furious.”  
Arthur had to check what being forgiving meant before he could classify the two new words in a way he could understand them.  
“Could being grumpy be another stage of anger?”  
A nod from the Frenchman- robot, and he added grumpy to his list.  
“I would like it to see you grumpy.” Added Francis with a light chuckle.  
Arthur frowned in confusion at first but his expression quickly shifted in a glare as he processed the information.  
“Oi!”  
“Yes! Just like that!”   
“Why would you like something like that?”  
Francis paused his actions in thoughts before cradling his hands against his heart and rubbing them comfortingly. His head tilted down, hair falling in cascade in front of the face, in a worried way as he didn’t manage to formulate a proper answer.  
“Uhm… well…”  
Arthur decided now was a perfect moment to feel regretful as his companion shook his head in discouragement and got back to work with a sad glint in the eyes.  
“I don’t know I’m sorry.”

Arthur stayed silent. There is no scientific reason to liking and wanting something, he noted.

November 2033 

“How about Louisiana?”  
“Alfred, for Godsakes, we want to move to another country, not another state!”  
“But the US is a great country! We can’t just leave it!”  
Mathew sighed at Alfred’s petulant groan and shook his head. Finding a new place to live was harder than it should be. They had been sitting on the Canadian’s bed for an entire hour now and hadn’t managed to do anything.   
“Fine then how about Canada? It’s not too far and it’s a peaceful place. I have a cousin there who hates my dad with a burning passion but adores me and will protect us against him if he ever decides to come and get us. He’s got enough influence for that. We will have a stable place to live while Francis and Arthur learn to adapt to life in society, and we will be able to continue our studies.”  
“Why didn’t you say that earlier!”  
“You kept saying you had the perfect solution!”  
“Yeah but still!”

Mathew grabbed a pillow and playfully hit Alfred with it. The American faked a shock face before lunging on him.  
“Why you!”  
They playfully wrestled for a few seconds, before brutally falling on the floor. The force of the impact left them breathless.  
“ow….”  
They turned to look at each other and started laughing. They still were when a furious banging was heard on the door.  
“LADS! You’re noisy! Shut up!” Screamed the angry voice of Mr.Williams.

Both boys reduced their laughter to a chuckle.  
“Grumpy old man!” Whispered Alfred.  
Once they managed to calm down, they sat back up and dusted themselves.  
“Canada’s a good plan.”  
“Great! How is the antidote coming up?”  
Alfred and Mathew had codenamed “antidote” the virus that would rid both androids of the total control their fathers had on them. A fitting title.  
“Still working on it. I have to do two separated virus because they have different codes, but I’ll manage.”   
“Try to get them ready as fast as you can… if anything happens…”  
“Nothing is going to happen. In less than two years we’ll be out of here with Francis and Arthur and they will finally have a life.”

Mathew smiled lightly at Alfred’s determined expression. He really hoped everything would be okay.

December 2033

“What do you mean, it sunk? It couldn’t have! Mathew himself assured me they had followed my orders and if I know one thing about that boy is that he can’t lie to me!”   
“They did, sir, however there was an explosion on board and the whole merchandise sunk. None of the crew members got killed however.” The Thankfully on the tip of Francis’ tongue stayed unsaid.   
“I don’t care about the crew! What about my order! They were supposed to protect it with their lives! We need this metal to build the heart of Alex and I made sure to order it in advance so this kind of thing wouldn’t happen! It is vital to our progression and I do not understand how such a mistake could have happened!”

The heart, Francis mused. Same size, same shape as a human. A perfect copy only better because as long as it got alimented by some kind of energy source it wouldn’t stop beating. This invention could save the lives of anyone with a heart failure but heartless Mr. Williams and Mr. Jones wanted to keep it secret.  
Francis didn’t reply because there really was nothing to say. The metal used was an extremely rare flexible metal found in the depth of Asia. In total, it would take and extra five month to have another batch sent here. The Android was glad he and Arthur were still too useful to have their own hearts taken and recycled instead of waiting this long.   
(Although Francis cringed at the thought of such precious resource going to waste, Mathew had had a great Idea)

Mr. Williams sat down at his desk, opened his computer and started typing furiously (he usually did that when he didn’t want anyone, not even Francis to know what he was doing). His android, still standing silently in front of his desk, felt a pang of anger at the sight of the man so mad about the loss of his metal and not the least concerned for his son’s well-being who had been of the ship when it exploded. He felt this was wrong (inside, he smiled. For a first opinion this wasn’t so bad.) Sure, Mathew was the one responsible for said explosion, but the man didn’t know that.   
“They won’t make me pay another time for their own mistake, correct?”  
“No sire, the contract you made them sign makes them responsible for any loss.”  
“Good.” Williams leaned back on his chair, a pensive look on the face.   
“Send a message to Arthur so he can warn his master about our little… situation. And send a message to neuron and co. saying that if they manage to send me my complete and fully functional order in a month, I will double what I pay them. We will be able to get started on the brain while we wait for the heart.”

Francis was dismissed by a gesture of the hand and he hurried off. He quickly sent all the necessary messages and hurried to the main hall where Mathew should be shortly. He had to warn him. Slowing down “Alex” was going to be harder than what they thought. 

February 2034

At first, Arthur didn’t see why Mathew hated his father so much. Of course it was easy to dislike the man because he was a dis-likeable man, just like Master Jones, but there was this deeper, darker feeling that Arthur had successfully identified as hate but there wasn’t much to support this feeling. Mister Williams didn’t verbally or physically abuse the boy and even if he didn’t show him any form of… affection, this didn’t seem to bother the lad much. He was very happy to let Francis dote on him.  
Eight month after the two scientists had started working together, he got his answer. Turned out that Mr. Williams had been in a very good mood these last few months and that Mathew’s hate was due to the too-kind heart of the boy. 

CRACK!  
Alfred jumped at the sound and barely had time to register Mathew literally jumping off his bed and running to it. Seeing that Arthur was heading towards the noise as well, he followed suit.   
“GET OUT OF MY WAY!”  
“YOU STAY AWAY FROM HIM!”  
Alfred was positive that Mathew had never shouted this loud and was even more taken aback when he realized that his friend was shouting at none other than his own father. Arthur and Alfred both hid behind the door, knowing better than to interrupt the two, they did, however take a quick look inside and were shocked by the sight.  
Mathew was standing between a red faced-closed fist Mr. Williams and Francis who was facing towards the door but looking down. Arthur tensed when he saw the purple marks around his left eye and his wrist. He knew both he and Francis had sensors, just like humans, that allowed them to feel pain, heat and textures, but he had never been bruised enough to see them color (which they only did when the sensation applied was too strong to endure and caused them to shut down the transmissions to the brain). Arthur felt mad but at the same time so, so sad. It was confusing.

Father and son fought for a few seconds before Mr. Williams waved Mathew off and turned away. The boy’s first gesture was to turn to his guardian and check if the sensors were turning back on properly. In two minutes the bruises were gone and stood up straight shaking away any trace of feelings from his eyes.

Later, Arthur would uneasily pat him on the back trying to put some comfort in the gesture and Francis would smile. Arthur decided he loved the smile and didn’t bother to try and explain why. 

He made sure to pat him on the back whenever he saw the faint blue light quickly disappearing from the skin.

April 2034

“I got the reply from my cousin. He accepted to take us and our androids in! He will also make sure to have any official papers necessary ready. Now all we need are the plane tickets…” 

June 2034

“In two months, the structure will be done and they will start programming. It will only take five months! We are running out of time!”

July 2034

“To celebrate the one year anniversary of our awesome escape plan… I have presents!”  
Francis and Arthur accepted, slightly confused, the two USB drives offered to them.  
“Your antidote!” Explained Alfred “Done before our fathers could finish this Alex! Aren’t I a genius?”  
The American pouted slightly when Arthur simply glared at him (a look he really seemed to like and often used) and proceeded with his explanation.  
“Just plug it in any computer and send it to yourselves. The file can only exist in one memory disk and so will erase itself completely from any computer immediately after every transfer. Once in your system, it will erase any link you have with your “masters” and replace them with fake one so that the virus doesn’t get detected. You will have to be careful, without the program, obeying will not be a priority so you must make sure you don’t skip any order.”

Arthur twirled the USB is his hand and smiled slightly.   
“Really Alfred, I didn’t know you could be so careful about something” He said teasingly with a smirk.   
The American squawked at him.  
“How can you say that?” He replied, a tad too dramatic.  
“It’s true.” Said Mathew  
“You too? I can’t believe it! Francis you’re on my side aren’t you?”  
“I’m sure Alfred is not so bad…. When he wants to.”  
Alfred gaped, they laughed. 

September 2034

“Frog. Stop that.”  
The tapping stopped.  
“Stop what?”   
Arthur glared at the French’s seemingly innocent smile but got back to his embroidery. The tapping started again.  
“Bloody Hell! Don’t you have anything better to do?”  
He almost regretted asking the question-almost. The answer was no and had been no since a month ago. They were useless now that the programming of the new robot had started; all they could do was wait. As soon as the final comparative tests were done they could make a run for it, but now they had to wait. The tapping stopped again. Francis crossed his arms over his chest, leaned back in his chair and pouted. Arthur ignored him. As predicted, the pouting didn’t last long and soon, the French robot was leaning over his shoulder and watching him work. 

“It’s pretty. I like it.”  
Arthur paused then asked as casual as possible:   
“Why?”  
The first time he had asked this question had ended in deception but this time, after worrying his lip for a bit, Francis answered.  
“I like the pattern and the colors.”  
Arthur smiled.  
“You are getting better at this.”  
“I know right!” Francis squealed excitedly. “You too” he added.

October 2034

“I have decided that you are a very grumpy person.”  
“Yes and you’re a slimy frog so were even.”

November 2034

“You don’t need this much time to get ready, for goodness sake you’re a robot!”  
“A refined one, mind you! At least I’m not a brute with caterpillars as eyebrows!”  
“OI! What did you say about my eyebrows?”

December 2034

“Mathew! Alfred! What the hell are you doing?”  
“I believe they are kissing, cher. K.I.S.S.I.N.G”  
“I know that, Idiot! The Hell are they doing that for?”  
“Have I taught you nothing? Oh cruel world! This is a manifestation of love! Embrace it!”

January 2035

“I can’t wait to be out of here.”  
“Me too, Francis, me too.”  
“You are going to stay with me right Arthur?”  
“Humm. As if I’d let you on your own, you wouldn’t last a week!”

February 2035

“It’s a woman? Why did they build a woman?”  
“Do you have a problem with women, Arthur?”  
“Of course not, don’t be a prat. I was just wondering is all”

Alex was a perfect robot, but not a perfect human. She was in the eyes of her creator, but not the four other inhabitants of the house. She executed her tasks perfectly, faster, cleaner and generally better than Arthur and Francis but she was cold. Not literally cold, her body temperature was the same as any human, but she didn’t a single ‘imperfection’ in her program. Within her first days in function, Francis and Arthur tested her to make sure of that. She had no emotions, no critical thinking and obeyed perfectly to both Mister Williams and Mister Jones. It wasn’t her fault, really. She was just unlucky enough to have two mad scientists to program her, what one would miss or not see, the other would correct so of course she turned out exactly how they wanted her. Francis felt a pang of pity when he saw her executing everything without question and thought back on how that was him just a few months ago. Incredible how things changed in such a short lapse of time.

Both androids watched quietly as she progressively took their places and casted them out. Francis was slightly sad to see Arthur replaced for the laundry (the look of concentration on his face was adorable) and Arthur felt anger when Francis got kicked out of the Kitchen (he looked so happy when he was engrossed in his cooking. But there was nothing they could do. Alfred and Mathew were getting to leave- and so were they.

March 2035

In the end, even the most carefully threaded plans had a problem. Theirs wasn’t even that careful but it had worked until now. They didn’t see it coming and it hit them hard.

Arthur and Francis were close to useless now but Williams and Jones were still running a few tests on them so they weren’t surprise when they were both called to the lab. What a mistake. Alex was being charged with yet another program (they were doping her with any program possible) while the two masters of the house seemed to be working on another machine. When their Androids entered, they ran a few quick tests like usual but when they backed away they didn’t shoo them off like usual.  
“The two of you have been great helpers and great robots, you will be remembered. Now your time is over.” Said Mister Jones very calmly. Arthur and Francis froze. This wasn’t supposed to happen so soon, not like that! They even expected the two to at least warn Alfred and Mathew before acting but apparently they didn’t even have a heart to do that.   
“Come on then, time to go.”   
Mr. Williams made a move to grab Francis by the arm to guide him to the machine meant to dispatch him but survival kicked in and the android backed away a step. He no longer bothered to hide his fear. Arthur would have laughed at the faces the two men made at this totally unexpected reaction, but he too was in danger of death and the fear shut him off efficiently. He grabbed his kin by the arm and backed them both away, as far from the machine as possible. The two humans were now pale with anger.  
“Unbelievable…. Did my son do this? Did Mathew? MATHEW, ALFRED! DOWN NOW!”  
The two boys came crashing down the stairs and didn’t take long to evaluate the situation, they didn’t have the time to say anything however, their respective fathers were on them as soon as they arrived.

Arthur registered the rest in a blur. There was some Screaming, hitting, then Francis ran forward to try to help, protect, Arthur must have followed because suddenly he had thrown Jones against a wall. He was screaming at him, calling him every poisoned name he had prepared for him so long ago. There was some begging involved, maybe. Arthur remembered the lights thought, the flashing red lights and the infernal noise ringing in his ears, threatening to break them. Somewhere over the chaos, Alex was repeating a word over and over with a cracking voice. Overload, overload.

Then there was a loud crash. He doesn’t see Francis jumping to protect Mathew, doesn’t realize himself jumping in front of Alfred all he remembers is thinking: Crap.  
What a terrible last word.  
Pain explodes on his back, then darkness. Finally. 

Month: unknown, Year: unknown 

“What do you think they are doing up there?”  
“Probably screaming at each other for a while before a nice cuddle. That is what they always did.”  
Mathew smiled and let his gaze from the stars up in the dark sky to Alfred’s face.  
“They have an odd way to love each other, but it’s their own. I think it’s adorable.”  
Alfred chuckled lightly.  
“You think everything is adorable. I’m just glad Arthur finally admitted it was love. God it was obvious with the way he was looming over Francis during their entire recovery but the idiot kept denying it.”  
“I told you they would come round eventually. Do you realise it’s been two years already?”  
“And what better way to celebrate the great big explosion that got us rid of the two most detestable man of this planet. A perfect ending. Villains down, heroes victorious and Damsels in distress celebrating. It was nice of your cousin to leave us the building for the night.”  
“Are farytales the only thing constantly on your mind? My god you’re a child.”  
“That’s why you love me!”

A few floors further up, sitting side by side on the edge of the roof Arthur and Francis had skipped their insult throwing session. They were entangled in an odd way but neither could bother to move. The silence and stillness of the night was blissful and Arthur decided it was perfect.  
“Francis?”  
His French companion didn’t answer but looked up at him and Arthur had to stop to stare at these deep blue pools of light before he could continue.  
“Will you grow rusty with me?” He finally murmured  
A hand came up and cupped his face, lips followed and the Englishman felt the smile curling them against his own”

It was the only answer he needed.

THE END

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Taddaaa! Here is the end! I hope you enjoyed it!

**Author's Note:**

> This first part was quite some work to write.... And to say it's only 8 pages long on word.... But I think it's not so bad. Constructive critiscm is welcome!  
> The second and last part will come soon


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